These are the April flowers of my world. My tulips will all open within the next week then begin their fade. It is imperative that I stay in this moment if I have any hope of enjoyment or pleasure from their appearance. And I do.
Thankfully, there are directed moments in my life so that I rise early, leave the house, and make a slow traverse on return. I have built-in time to "smell the roses."
Over these last forty odd days, I have reviewed my obsessions, quirks and whims. They are many. Sometimes I was overwhelmed at just how out of sorts some areas of my life have become. Forget the pretense of having it all together. It is just shoved into piles as I kick a path through my day.
This year, for the Lenten Season, I committed to letting go of my indulgence around purchasing yarn and alcohol - liquor specifically. The issue was not doing without, but rather, delaying the purchase of more. For even as I can display the vast enoughness of plenty, I have a deep abiding urge to get more, more, more.
I faced and addressed my feelings as I completed a crochet project from my adequate yarn stash. What longing lies beneath the need for more yarn? Same issue as I poured a shot of whiskey. In my angst, I will delay drinking the last corner, waiting until the bottle can be replaced. I want more. The truth is, always has been, I have enough.
Owning the enoughness of life challenges the need for more. There was enough yarn to complete the project. I have enough whiskey for this drink. And the biggest unmentioned issue, I earn enough money to give, save, and pay my bills. What more can I ask for? While you may ask for more, I am happy, content, and joyful with enough.
All around my space, I have posted reminders to embrace enough. This Lenten Season honed my focus, not just on enough, but on the areas where I have obsessively gathered too much. Not only must I let go of grasping for more, but also release my grasp of what I have.
Spring urges the energy from the bulbs for leaves and flowers. Holding on means stagnation, rotting, and death. I am inspired by giving and letting go knowing that I am part of the reciprocity cycle. The more you give, the more is given to you.
Blessed be!