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Sunday, June 14, 2015

Haggard Moments

Generally, I am all about peaceful moments, especially in the morning. I move slowly. Drink my coffee and find a place to rest outside. I am surrounded by the lush greens and bright flowers. It is still wet and rainy even as the summer heats up. The depth of green protects the lilies that would have faded by now.

Then this morning comes. I'm going to take a moment to complain about the insanity of it all. Of course it all works out in the end, but we are not there yet. So, here is the report from along the journey...

I have this job...

And I have these commitments to being and showing up in loving, supportive ways for others...

And then, there's me.

I work forty hours on the weekend. The work's fine. Lots of ease. Little effort. There would be less effort if I didn't get pissed off about the things I cannot change. That's my personal challenge. As I type, I realize I have stepped away from my initial angst that had me writing my resignation - in a text message. (Yes, I would do that, and break up on a post it note.)  I have no reason to resign. It was just a feeling, and feelings change.

Well, how about that. Things have shifted. I feel better and now, I have tasks to do. There is still this job. I still have way more obligations than make sense, but I will untangle this ball of yarn and knit something better.

My new and good for this report - I learned to knit in May. Now I knit and crochet, daily. That's how I am keeping it together.

How about you?