Toward Being Far More Interesting

Happier, Healthier, and Far More Interesting!

I decided not to wait until I am free from my current employment/financial obligations to get on with the life I long to live. I have great plans and now is the time to both prepare for the next step as well and practice living to the fullest. 

Here are a few of the shifts I have made so far: 

Pilates Classes

I’ve been going to my Pilates Reformer classes weekly for the past two months. It continues to be a great check in on my posture and form. However, this is a rather pricey option, so I decided to buy the Pilates Power Gym.  It allows me to continue my workouts at home with the information I learn each week. There are excellent infomercials that explain use and technique, so that even when I return to the studio I have a bit more understanding with which to approach movements. I enjoy the feedback of the instructor and being in the class setting. 

On a more personal note, I have revised my profile for Online Dating. Most of the interactions have been interesting, even if not really my cup of tea. I had the meet up previously discussed, another connection with whom I was talking on the phone for a bit and still another that I write or chat with on line. While not quite matches, they have made exploring the territory interesting.  This profile is almost four years old and only recently have I received any bites…

Here, where I live, I signed up as a Language Partner through the University Women’s Center. This program matches native English speakers with women new to the country and language. We have met twice. Kim is sweet and personable. We had a long delightful chat about who we are and our families. As much as she wants to meet to learn to speak and understand English better, I can imagine that life will be considerably easier for her as she learns the organization of the city. Her biggest complaint was that in this country we are always busy. There is so much driving everywhere; and she is required to cook, always – three meals a day. There are no places to find her native foods prepared to eat out or carry home. Sadly, as representative of the world as this city is, there are few shops that offer the “materials” necessary for them to replicate home. This is a style of forced homogenization. 

Leaving our meeting, I ran through the grocery store for a gift (black raspberry liqueur), almond butter, and flax seeds. What I found, in addition, was Celestial Seasoning Teas at 75% off. Great day in the morning! I now have a fabulous stock, plus lots to share. Could the day get any better?

I signed up for my six week Gym Membership. I had bought a special deal though one of those group coupons for my daughter, Z, who is visiting. She is excited about Body Pump to the tune of several classes a week. For the price they offered, it is worth the money even if she merely makes it to three classes, of any kind. I started my schedule with the sculpt class. It was actually quite nice. I forgot the nice thing about going to classes in the morning is that most of the people in class are older, retired, or stay at home partners. There is no pressure to perform, compete or judge. The instructor was upbeat and talkative, working out at the same time. And while I remember all the moves, I have been away for a very long time. I left class remembering how very much I used to love working out and feeling the thrill of the return.

Z and I attend the power yoga class on Wednesday afternoon and while I will not recommend it to anyone under any circumstances, I will return next week. The music was loud and fast. The room was dark. And the instructor zoomed through her vinyasa flow at sprint speed. Besides the fact that we could not see her or ourselves, we could not hear her most of the time and when we did, had no idea what she was talking about. She failed to call, cue correctly or identify the pose until after she reached and moved away from it. The starting point for her vinyasa slow was downward facing dog. She told us that before we started. She cues it as, “And up!” Lots of pushups and lounges with pulses. Thankfully, I learned power yoga from the originator – Bryan Kest . “All you need to do is breath, move, and sweat.” With that bit of knowledge and understanding, I accepted what I was available from her offering and remembered to be my own yogi. (Another thanks to Bryan.)

I am approaching the last three weeks and have committed to living each days more fully that the previous. There is no waiting for things to come together, fall in place, or be just so. Some day is now and we are called to be here. 

My life overflows with love, joy and happiness. The rest can fall to the wayside.

Yoga - Beyond the Mat

As we approach our mats, we accept the opportunity to become reacquainted with ourselves.  Not only to mindfully connect our mind, body and breath, but also to listen to what comes up. Honoring our physical selves, reaching for our edge or choosing to back away, reveals all manner of joy, ache, or pain.

In a recent visit to the mat I extended into a forward fold and as I walked my hands around to grasp my ankle, my mind drifted to my unpainted toenails. Though it was only a split second, it was a criticism. Thankfully, I remembered hearing that if people were worried about my pedicure they were not focused on their mat or practice. That applied to me as well. 

The point is, that during our practice, all manner of self talk comes up. As we remain non-judgmental we will be able to hear ourselves, refocus on our breath and presence and let go. The hearing is what becomes important. How am I speaking to and of myself as I practice? How far will I wander from my breath and push my way into a pose? Do I remember the way of ease? Is my focus inward or outward? 

Having rolled our mats away, we head into the world with that same self talk. The ways that we push ourselves without consideration of  ease leads to injury, stress, burnout, and disappointment. Those moments when we find ourselves bored can be relieved with a bit of effort. By extending ourselves beyond the previously established boundaries we find we have more to offer, to share. 

Am I willing to risk looking different to be myself? We are each unique and must look to our own bodies and practice for the expression of that moments pose (asana). Every downward facing dog is new, with its own insights to teach. While we may follow the cues of instruction, the essence of being there is personal and internal. Looking around for comparison to another rejects understanding for ourelves. So, too, when we live our lives in the reflection of others. The energy we spend keeping up with outside standards drains us, leaving little energy or attention for our true passions. We trade being present and aware for what looks "right." 

The practice of yoga (the union of mind, body and breath) free of competition, expectation, and judgment, clears the channels for depth of understanding, healing wounds, and overcoming obstacles. What comes up on the mat - feelings of hurt, loss, criticism, powerlessness, or fear - are offered that we might release them and move through. As the channel clears we receive peace, love and joy - in abundance. The practice of yoga allows us to tame the mental chatter that keeps us distracted from living in the present.

We are always welcome on our mats.Our mats are safe spaces to release, relax and let go. No class or teacher necessary. As we decide, we come, standing, sitting, or lying, and ground again into the earth. We allow our hearts to lift with expansion and bellies to pull in with release. Breathing belongs to us, in or out of class - on or off the mat. 

We practice yoga on the mat. We live yoga off the mat.

Namaste

Lenten Musings 3

As the season comes to a close, I continue to assess the choices I have made and am making daily. In the realm of letting go, I decided the best way to let go of fifty items a day was to use up the supplies I have been storing over the years. My deep freeze was full and this became the opportunity to begin cooking meals for the week, utilizing the items available, without going to the store and adding to the process.

I delayed shopping for eight days. The problem I found was that some “emergency” supplies had gone bad - expired. Seems you can’t save everything for a rainy day. So, we ate up food, threw away wasted items, recycled piles of papers, bottles, and cans I have been storing for reuse. The reality is I will get more. There is no need to save it all.

This week I returned to the store for half and half, no waiting on that. I passed on even looking at the liquor section as that is one of my major obsessions. And since I decided I would not buy any more liquor (or wine) I also stopped drinking it up. I ran out of yogurt and though I replaced my basic needs in one trip, I picked up another dozen or so today. I will be okay with that choice.

I can feel shopping. Those items above do not meet the internal need to just shop, to look, compare, then purchase. As I wade though my feelings around my relationship shift, I find that the lost of both brings up feelings of longing. I easily shift without succumbing but I notice they are connected. In the past, I comforted myself with the knowledge that life was much less expensive without a partner/lover/grrlfriend.  I always receive the best, most perfect gifts because I know exactly what I desire. And I buy for myself.

I am reading, writing, journaling, studying, praying, mailing more cards, notes and letters. I am talking to friends occasionally. More than anything, I have a deeper understanding of the side trips I have made in the last year and am taking actions to correct the directions. My have a better garden plan. I workout regularly - either at the gym, on the trail, or out and back around my neighborhood.

I will conclude the Lenten season in San Francisco with the lovely Z! We will have coffee in the city, tea at her place, share yoga at Yoga To The People. We will take lots of pictures and celebrate Earth Day together. My life is good. I imagined having a wonderful joyous experience and this is it!

Look to this day!

Namaste

A peek, glimpse, consideration...

This was my garden/yard for 2010. Looking through my pictures reminds me of the returning joy. At times winter seems harsh and barren. Sometimes it is just that, but then I remember the seeds I have planted and the work already done. Yes, there is more for this years harvest and this days joy. But, I am heaping it atop what has gone before and they join to become more glorious, more magnificent.

Just a lovely day on the day.  Headed back in two weeks time. One of my focuses this trip will be photos for my yoga post.

Extended side angle pose. Here's to sharing yoga with family and friends.
Namaste.