Putting Winter to Bed

The cold was short and unpredictable.  Still is. Eighty degrees on day and 36 the next night. All the calendar celebrations around the world will not control the weather. What are you going to do?

Knit, create art, and ferment.

Collage pages for art journals.

The girls work on craft projects.

First set of pages finished.

Splatter painting. Stage one of something.

No Purls Allowed Shawl - Ravelry

No Purls Allowed - Ravelry

Ribbed Cowl - occupying time

That's good for a couple thousand words.

I'm still pulling my 40 hours on the weekend gig, and have begun to rethink the decision. Re-think. I just remembered I have a plan to hang in here until school is out. That means June. Whew! Some days...

The work is fine. It's my constant need to adjust my attitude that is the problem. That's always the problem. I spend 34 of the 40 hours each weekend working on letting go and finding a way to not give a f---. So, God grant me the serenity and all.

No pictures of the ferments, but I have been constant in my management of my ginger bug. Friday Ferments include a couple quarts of sauerkraut and a second ferment of juice or tea with ginger bug. My next adventure is water kefir. Several people in town have water kefir grains, but seem to have abandoned them in the back of their fridge. My home is still too cool to care for the grains so I reckon when I am ready I will find some, locally.

Let's talk about money for a minute. I am still all about saving; however, I have recently (in the last year) incurred two large debts. I am thankful I had the resources to cover the need, but in surrendering my funds, I reconsidered how I have done without (though only in the most luxurious ways). I decided that if I have the money to support others, I have the money to enjoy my life as I choose. Today that means yarn. Nice yarn. Wool, soy silk, and their blends. While I have quite the storage bins/chest/trunk full, one can never have too much - yarn.

Here's to saving where you can and splurging when you want.

M 

Whiskey or Yarn

That is the question. In reality I must have both.

While rarely posting, I am still sorting my ideas around frugal living and having it all. All to me is good drink, plenty of yarn, and the time to relax and enjoy both. Thankfully, I have taken a job where I get paid while allowing enough free time to crochet. I have reasoned out that I can easily get three hours daily to work on my projects. Usually, I can have a complete hour at a time.

The issue, hence the title, is whether or not I can reasonably afford to have both good whiskey (or liqueur) and as much yarn as I need. I have quite a collection of yarn. It is just not enough for a large project and often I make one item then frog it (rip it rip it - apart) to make another. It's making the decision to buy all 20 plus skeins at once to make the scarf, dress, blanket, that boggles me. The error of waiting means ending up with mixed lots (and varying colors or textures).

I'm not waiting on the whiskey. Not! I will trade down a few dollars and for the month of January I drank the really good stuff - Elijah Craig, Makers Mark, Bulleit - instead of Ezra Brooks (at half the price). I have been gifted six bottles of the good stuff. This is it, until my birthday and the holidays. I have been frugal enough to make it last years. Or two, at least.

Back to the choice. It's not really an issue of finances, as much as deserving. Do I deserve to have as much yarn as I desire? Am I willing to pay to have what I deserve? How long will I put off getting what I believe I deserve? Where and how do I need to shift?

I am still working on those questions. Until then, here is how I made the decision:

I buy yarn regularly. I generally wait for a sale, but still have been unwilling to purchase as much as I want or need due to the above. Today I found a good deal. I can justify each item financially (as a great deal). I can justify the purchase by paying half with money earned and saved for stuff I want. The other half will be absorbed in my contentment and commitment to delay any further yarn purchases until March 2015. (This might be a useful Lent focus. I just started to panic.)

Oh happy day! Here's what I love:

Women's Peaked Hat - January challenge The Crochet Crowd

Gift for my son

Another peaked hat

Peaked hat

Slouchy hat

Peaked hat, some more. This became a favorite this month - January 2015

Squishy scarf - for my Z!

Living the Life You Dream

This is a photo of me from years ago. September 2011. I was vacationing in Arizona on one of the hottest days of that year. The mercury hit 113° in the shade. This was the second vacation that year. The first in North Carolina - sweet and mild.

My friend drove to a monastery/retreat center and we explored the grounds and buildings. It was both fun and educational. More than that, I loved sharing time with my friend.

Even as I type this post, I can't believe it has been that long. We haven't spoken since, but that is outside the point of this post. Just two months after this vacation, I quit my job. November 11, 2011. This month is the fourth anniversary of that decision. It was one of the best decisions I have made in my life.

Before I left my full time job, I researched people who had decided to leave the idea of working full-time and living clearer, closer, and within their dreams. I read plenty of clogs about young people making similar choices, but wanted to connect with those nearer 50 years old, with children, families and mortgages.

There are a plethora of blogs and sites dedicated to living well with less, saving and managing money, alternative earning opportunities. Still, I didn't find what really met my needs, so I started writing, counting down the days, and designing a plan to make my move.

I am leaving on vacation in three days. I have been home from my last job since August 1, 2014. Before I travel, here is a recap of how I managed to live the life of my dreams.

I do go back to work. When I work, I maintain my budget to live well below my means. I believe to have more, we must give more. I live by the principle - give first, save next, spend last. I work and therefore deserve to have pleasure from the effort I expend. I budget for my luxuries as well as my needs.

This year, I am excited to sort living on a budget while in San Francisco. At home, I get by with $25/week for groceries and have no need for transportation beyond driving my car two or three days a week. I will be there two weeks. During that time I will travel to East Bay a few times to visit friends and to Northern California for my birthday. While away, I will post on both my adventure and how the budgeting goes.

You can live the life of your dreams, whatever that looks like. If you ask, I will believe with you.

Travel safely.

My Secret

Here it is. I obsessively keep this to myself (or my journal) and only allow seconds of the experience. I am "gently" FREAKING OUT! Yes, I am positive, uplifting, trusting and overflowing with faith. I have been living for nine months on a six month financial plan. Things have been, for the most part, smooth and easy - except for the numerous job rejections. Even those didn't get me down, for long. There are so many jobs to apply for; I am holding for my right and perfect work situation.

However, one week ago my car just stopped. I collected it today from the service station and now have $1750 in debt. It is the beginning of the month and bills are due again. I looked at my bank accounts. Hmm...Rapid heart rate. Flush. Long slow exhale...

I'm just putting it out there, honestly. Sometimes I, ever so slightly, have a moment of panic. It doesn't hang around long. My right mind knows the truth - everything is as it is. Free of shoulds, woulds, and coulds, we can step into the moment and make decisions that are fresh and new.

In a few minutes I will leave for my temp job that started yesterday. I got a call back for a job offer, but they want me to have Saturday evening availability and to come in Tuesday at 1:30 to discuss the offer. I need to work Tuesday at 1 PM. I have an unpaid orientation Wednesday and Thursday that will pay more than either of these jobs and give me more convenient hours (for all those who make demands on my time, energy and effort). It is possible I could work two of these jobs, with more ease than effort.

That's how my panic resolves. These are the choices for today. The only one I have to act on today is going to work. That's it. I've paid the mortgage. I have shelter. There is plenty of food. Air is still free.

A year ago, I committed to letting go of the illusion of security. I made a plan. Plans are a form of security. We all build foundations that hold our lives in place. When they are shaken, we panic. Now, do we repair, rebuilt, or allow life to lead us to the next great adventure?

When your world is trembling, who do you turn to?

References

I'm amazed at the number of calls I get from collection agencies looking for people I know. Amazed. They are generally polite and explain that they have been unsuccessful in contacting the debtor (lendee) and would like me to pass along a message. Hmm.

Okay. I used to explain that I hadn't seen the person lately and was not likely to do so in the near future. Ever persistent, the caller continues to press for me to send a message, make a call, reach out and re-establish connection. Fine. Okay. Sure. Bye.

After enough of these calls, I just agreed, took the information and went on about my day. This morning I asked, "How long ago was my name and number left for reference?"

"About a year ago."

"That's how long it's been since I heard from her."

"You haven't spoken since?"

"Not once."

"Thank you."

Maybe this company won't call back. I have a contact in my phone labeled "Stupid Fuckers." When I get calls I have no intention of answering I assign them to that contact and the calls go directly to voice mail.

What in the world possesses people to list their friends as references and then default on their obligations AND not worry about their friends getting multiple calls? Do they think I don't mind extraneous calls day and evening? Do they somehow believe that I will remain relaxed during the hounding? Wait, maybe they don't care. And why don't companies check out references before they extend credit? Isn't that the point of references/contacts?

On another track, I sat through two interviews in which the interviewers explained that the current employees are immature, have a tendency to not show up and are generally off task during the course of a shift. Why exactly so they get to keep their jobs? Me, I'm still waiting for a call back.

Is it unethical to post a message on a social networking site to get a professional call back? 

Coconut Oil - Head to Toe

Coconut oil is great for the body - head to toe. I included a photo of the actual products I use rather than offer a generic discussion. 

Coconut oil is great for hair care and treatment. It contains fatty acids that act as anti-microbial agents at the scalp and hair roots. Used regularly it can help get rid of dandruff. Because it retains moisture, coconut oil helps prevent hair breakage and damage. Coconut oil contains Vitamin E. It keeps scalp and skin healthy and hair rejuvenated.

Coconut oil is great for cleaning and moisturizing the face. It is naturally antibacterial, calming, and moisturizing. Coconut oil melts at 72 degrees, and a little dab will do you. Apply to face with fingers and then wipe away with a warm cloth. Scoop out solid oil and place in the palm of your hand, it will melt. It only takes a little. Coconut oil is perfect for removing make-up. When coconut oil is absorbed into the skin and connective tissues, it helps to reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles by helping to keep connective tissues strong and supple.

Apply coconut oil to your body for skin care and healing. It is known to improve skin elasticity, is great for shaving, and serves a perfect "glide" for massaging tired muscles. Coconut oil is rich in proteins. These proteins keep skin healthy and rejuvenated, both internally and externally. Coconut oil also helps in the treatment of psoriasis, dermatitis, eczema, and other skin infections. When applied on scrapes and cuts, coconut oil forms a thin, chemical layer which protects the wound from outside dust, bacteria and virus. Coconut oil speeds up the healing process of bruises by repairing damaged tissues. Coconut oil will aid in exfoliating the outer layer of dead skin cells, making the skin smoother. It also penetrates into the deeper layers of the skin to strengthen the underlying tissues.

Apply coconut oil before or after baths to shift the effect of drying soaps. Use as the base for body scrubs (which can be made at home, easily, by combining sea salts or sugar with coconut oil). Used after sunburns, coconut oil can help reduce redness and limit some of the damage done by sun exposure. 

Coconut oil is great for digestion. The saturated fats in coconut oil have anti-bacterial properties that help control, parasites, and fungi that cause indigestion and other digestion related problems such as irritable bowel syndrome. Coconut oil has been proven to stimulate your metabolism, improve thyroid function, and escalate energy levels. The fat in coconut oil also aids in the absorption of vitamins, minerals and amino acids, making you healthier all around.

Use coconut oil for a natural sexual lubricant. When moisture is desired in personal areas or for vaginal dryness, coconut oil holds its glide longer than commercial lubricants and without strange unidentifiable ingredients or sugar (glycerine) which can cause yeast infections or promote them. Coconut oil is anti-viral and antibiotic, an added advantage during sensual activities. Remember, oils are incompatible with condoms and diaphragms.

Pamper your feet. Coconut oil is an effective cure for athletes foot because it has anti-fungal properties. As a moisturizer, rub coconut oil on your feet either after taking a bath or before going to sleep. It will cure your cracked heels and soften your feet. Corns and calluses will also be softened by applying coconut oil. Soak your feet in warm water with a sea salt and a teaspoon of coconut oil. Coconut oil softens and moisturizes while removing dirt from the outer layer of skin, leaving it shiny and smooth.

Coconut oil has been a well kept secret. We tend to only get the marketed bit. There is so much more to know.

About the picture. These are my body care products. I own some commercial products, but can't justify replacing them when they run out because I already own what I need. Dr. Bronner's is made from coconut oil and is Kirk's Castile soap. I included the cost for comparison to other body products on the market. We have a choice. 

I save where I can, to splurge when I want.

A Penny Saved

A penny saved is a penny earned, but does it matter any more?

Pennies don't seem to be worth much these days. We leave them lying where they are, donate them to the tins or cups at cash registers, and sometimes just toss them aside as nuisance. What we seem to have forgotten is that a penny is related to a nickel, a nickel to a dime, a dime to a quarter, and a quarter to a dollar. As we toss our pennies, we discard our dollars as well. But then, for some, the single (one) dollar bill is reduced in value as well.

There are plenty of moments when we notice that dime. When gas (petro) prices increase we are willing to shop around for a dime less and some people even know the differences by the pennies. We neglect the cost of driving the extra distance to get the lower price, but we know it is out there.

We willingly purchase bottled water. soda, or drinks at one dollar a liter (or more) but grimace at the price of fuel, milk, or bread. We support savings on the dollar menus to eat fast "food", yet turn from the bargains of dried beans, rice, and raw product to make more and better of the same meal.

Back to the pennies. One hundred pennies still equals a dollar. One suggestion for increasing savings is to empty your pockets, each evening, of all change into a container. At the end of a specified period, the coins are counted and applied toward the goal reward. While pennies are heavy and space consuming, my suggestion is that as we become more conscious of our pennies that thoughtfulness is extended to our money in general. We can then begin to include paper money into the savings, perhaps the singles or windfalls, unexpected income, and savings.

Penny savings are still available. When we go shopping and make a purchase for less than expected, that's a savings. Here is the penny saved. When we attend the cost of products and services, we pocket the savings. If we neglect our fortune, the savings will be absorbed into the next purchase without acknowledgement.

Saving pennies also make allowances for splurges. I save when I can so I can splurge when I want. Learning to save pennies extends into the habit of saving dollars. Recognizing relationship makes it easy. We are just helping friends find each other.

We are shopping in San Francisco. Dollars spend WAY faster here than they do in the Midwest. Thankfully, I've been saving for this adventure.

Working the Budget - 34 days or else

Some nights I can barely work up the energy to prepare for work. I do, but the struggle is intense. By the time I finish my coffee and head out the door, I am in the groove. Then I arrive in the parking garage and the struggle begins, again. My latest motivational mantra is, “Working the budget. I am thankful for the opportunity to work tonight. I’m working the budget.” Moments arise when I feel like I could just walk out, except for my commitment to the budget. Budget says, “keep coming back - it works!” (Shout out NA.)

In these final days at work,  There is great discontent amongst the masses. It seems  enough for them  to bitch, whine, and moan about how things are. And in those exact moments it is even more necessary that I find a way to show up with the option to leave. I must hold the reality that the way in is also the way out. The only trap exist in mind. To be sure, I am certainly crabbier than I need be, especially as I have resolved to do something different. My current distress flows from both what I want (stuff) and what I need (freedom).

I must confess that with all the saving I have been proclaiming, I have made a few more purchases. I bought a Pilates Reformer. My rationalization is that when I am here writing, crocheting, reading, thinking, cleaning, volunteering, playing, dancing, and generally enjoying my time, I will be able to continue my fitness levels in preparation to teach again. As I workout at home I will be stronger, and having an instructor to monitor my form will support my progress. Eventually I will spread those check-ins farther apart as the investment in my home equipment has shifted my funds (which would have come from a small discretionary line) from money available to pay for classes. (I will post my Total Gym for sale. Its all about balance.)

I desire a break from the focus on earning money, that I may more effectively relax into my life - relax, as in take time to dream, imagine and believe. I continue my time in preparation - eliminating debt, filling the pantry, and saving instead of spending. I hear those justifications for my choices and release them as well, honoring all my desires, hopes and dreams.

My priority is to leave this job (in my established time frame).Toward that end, I am working the budget - everyday.

Live as if every moment counts

Live as if every moment counts.
Sing as if joy flows from your heart.
Dance as if everyone is watching - entranced.
Love knowing that wounds heal.
Work as a choice. You really don’t need the money.

Money can’t buy love, happiness, or health. And while money can buy food, you can’t eat it – money, that is. And, you can get food other ways.

Last night I took a few chances with the “I will not always be with you” proposition. In general, I feel as if what I do at work is dismissed by the licensed staff. I serve as support staff, helping with all manner of computer entry and clarification of the medical order process. My goal, in any job, is to teach the personnel to manage for themselves. For those who prefer to have gofers there is great resistance. The reality is that some tasks they can to for themselves with greater efficiency than I can do for them. In this most recent teaching the nurse stated that she would probably forget and need me to teach her again in two months. “No, this is your learning and your time. I will not be here in two months.”

There. I said it. I’ve been hinting at it, sometimes daily. There are still eleven weeks, but I am putting some ownership to the process, feeling what comes up next. There were other moments when I share what my dream is, how I want to show up. Few understand, as some staff, licensed and not, work six twelve hour days in a roll. “They need the money.” When we see someone out of their scheduled routine, they will proclaim the joy (or attachment) to overtime.

As I left the building, I stopped to buy a sherbet treat for DA and I. I had given it up for both the cost (though minimal until you have one daily) and the calories (because I eat the WHOLE thing). The cashier asked the customer before me why she was in the building this morning. She replied, “Overtime. I need the money. Who doesn’t?” I raised my hand, “Not me.”

I recognize that we barter for housing, utilities, and food with money. My point is that all that money will not serve us if we are too tired, exhausted, sick, worn out, or busy to truly enjoy our lives. Or if what we do to earn that overtime leaves us feeling generally disagreeable. It is not for me to say what brings another joy, merely to light a beacon for those who hold the hope of living authentically and being free.

Live the days of your life.

Day 96

100 days and counting

I choose to start my process of shifting toward a happier, healthier and more interesting life with a New Moon Fast. The theory is that one begins the fast with the first 24 hours of the New Moon, taking in only water and fruit juice. Fasting during the syzygies of the moon allows the lunar gravitational pull to assist in the detoxification process, jumpstarting the removal of toxins from the body.  This worked well as my time began on Saturday and I had been up the night before working. I enjoyed my morning yogurt and lunch then took a nap for the mid-day. When I woke I wasn’t hungry; this not my normal meal time. Thankfully, come the morning I was ready to enjoy my water and juice. The afternoon would bring lunch soon enough.

My big excitement for this time was to begin harvest of my potatoes. I have all those buckets I planted in hopes of feeding my world. I turned the first bucket to dump only a small cluster of Yukon Gold. Few. Not at all what I was expecting. The potatoes that grew had done so in the soil rather than continuing into the straw, which was to be my clean harvest. Next bucket, same find. I continued through four, total and then decided the others could wait until later in August. I replanted the tubers with buds back in an empty bucket and filled it with straw and soil. Second chances all around.

After soaking and washing my harvest, I sliced the Yukon Gold with onions, fresh garlic and green peppers and placed them to cook in the crock pot for the morning. The Red Kennebec I cooked and made potato salad. Both dishes are incredibly excellent. Whatever distress I felt about the size of the harvest has dissipated with the finished product. Next year we will just clean the soil from the crop and go for a full bucket.

I am rethinking my finances. For the most part, I have to give up shopping as a hobby. And I shop for a hobby – just for fun. I think everything I buy is terribly important and that’s the issue.  I was restocking the bathroom tissue and noticed I am down to my last eight rolls. Singles – I have no multi-pack left. Actual physical panic arose. I began to make a list of the supplies that are running low when I remembered that I am committed to spending less. If I want to leave my job on the decided date, no matter what, I will have to let go of my compulsion to keep my home stocked to the hilt.

Then while I was resting before work, reading, feeling amazed by the writing and the story, I rolled over and saw a note on my phone.  “Buy me this!” I leave these notes for myself so I can remember to buy things when I get home. Sometimes I find a deal that I don’t have time to purchase at work so I use a piece of colored tape as a cue. I jumped out of bed, went directly to my computer and began working on the order. I edited the cart a few times. As I was ready to pay I remembered that I didn’t need yet another whatcamacallit.  Good grief! I closed the browser, left the room and returned to my book. See, it’s an issue.

This is not about saving. It’s about not spending. I made a healthcare choice outside of my budget and now have to pay for it (credit card). I thought I had a decent handle on my finances and my debt, but with my last bill I see I was living in a bit of delusion. Nothing left to do but crawl out of this hole. I will use the money I am not spending as steps into the light.

Living debt free means I can mange my life on $12K a year. The rest is gravy. Getting there is my goal. The figure means absolutely ZERO DEBT. There will be no minimum payments. I will step up to the plate of delayed gratification, some more. I imagine I can find work to bring in that level of earnings and more. This next journey is toward finding what feeds my soul while maintaining my physical well-being. Until then, I have some feelings to move through – feelings around having enough, managing with what I already have and noticing that more will always come.

Each day, with its new opportunities, brings deeper joy and clear vision toward a purposeful life.

“Hard Economic Times”

“Hard Economic Times” seem to affect those who have lived in an extended fashion more than those who have managed their lives and finances close to the belt.  If while in the concept of plenty we are living large, enjoying the fruits of our labor, playing keep up and catch up with the Joneses, we can expect any type of economic crunch to become “hard economic times.” 

My thought this morning began as I was hanging the laundry in the bright sunlight.   Not about the clothes themselves, but the clothes pins.  We are marketed all kinds of bag closures – magnetic, giant plastic frames that say “chips,” “cereal,” or “bread.”   If we were to look around we could save our precious dollars and use what we have – clothes pins, paper clips, binder clips, anything used to hold things together.  Mostly we have to look around.

We (Americans) have become content to watch the news and forget that we are a part of the world.  Our attention is heighted only as we feel the effects of economic stress personally.  So the fact that the rest of the world has been dealing with wheat and rice shortages, rioting even, doesn’t hit home until Sam’s Club and Costo limit bulk purchases of rice (and it makes the evening news, even though it is a sham).  The price of wheat affects the price of beer.  The cost of fuel – petro - becomes evident in the cost of all staples - bread, milk, anything moved down the road by vehicle to the grocer.

So, it’s time to tighten our buckles, yes?  Perhaps for many, but let’s visit the others who have lived within their means.  As this is subjective, I will define “means” my way.  In my opinion, living within one’s means, includes giving, saving, and expenses that stay below 80% of the net income.  Sad that we are able to borrow based on the gross, but must pay back based on the net.  Understandably, there are expenses that arise and reach into the formula, except that giving and saving must stay systematic. 

Giving acknowledges that we belong to a world greater than the one we face on a daily basis.  Giving reminds us that we have the means and opportunity to support others.  Giving can restore our sense of humanity and community.  We give in love out of self interest, knowing that as we give to others we give to ourselves. 

Saving allows us a little extra cover.  Imagine crawling into bed with the blankets and sheets that reach over the sides.  When you turn in the night, the warmth stays around you.   That’s savings.  It’s not about the amount, but rather, the intention of setting aside for another time, different choice, or next opportunity.

The net income is what we started with, having shared appropriately with the federal, state, and local governments (parking, dues, insurance, and retirement – maybe).  I am positive it takes a great deal of forethought to maintain balance between what one earns and what one spends.  We are inundated with choices, opportunities and pressure to hand over our hard earned cash.  Find absolutely no judgment here regarding how your money is spent.  I have plenty of spending errors I am correcting as I clear my space.  However, in being thoughtful of the economic front we must at least bring our attention and awareness to how, when, where and what we spent.

Take a moment to honestly examine where the money goes.  Rediscover your cash like a long lost lover.  Explore its value; inhale its essence; admire the remembered pleasure.  Think, “Would I give you over so freely, again?”  Without holding both the value of our cash and what it takes to receive it we allow money to slip through our fingers unnoticed, unaware.

“Hard economic times” will have less impact on those who become and remain mindful of both their needs and the resources to meet them.  As we bring focus on our behaviors we have the first tool for change.  Hard economic times require change.