Soul Massage

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Connection, Intimacy, and Sexual Satisfaction

On any given day we reach out to make contact with another. Perhaps this is another person, a friend, relative, or neighbor. Maybe instead we reach inward for our Divine Source to buoy our hope, expand our love, share our joy. But steadily and willingly we seek connection.
In a world where we are separated by time, space, and electronics, connections are few and far between. We have become a transient society, moving away from friends and families in search for greater job opportunities, education and adventure. We communicate by email, phone, text, and social media. We make friends through those same mediums, sometimes building entire virtual families and worlds. As we travel through our days we are plugged in with headphones or closed in our vehicles with CDs, radios and audio books. We have lost the art of smiles and waves. Our kind words and greetings fall on deaf ears.
How are we to know true connection? How will we choose the vulnerability that leads to intimacy? We have become a people afraid to look one another in the eye, to face each other head on, to delve deeply and know. We have relaxed the standards of physical contact and hope that will bring us connection. Instead, we have invested unrealized bits of our hearts and souls in unknown markets. We expect a grand return only to find disappointment, repeatedly. It is impossible to share the parts of ourselves we have failed to recognize or acknowledge. Until we open to fully accept all that we are and love each aspect that is, we will shy away from being present with another. And there is the beginning of connection.
Intimacy asks that we relax into the now and submit ourselves free of the burdens of the past and the anxieties of the future. To be intimate is to be vulnerable – unmasked, naked, not physically, but emotionally. Intimacy begins in our sharing honestly of and about ourselves. We claim the parts that feel “embarrassing” and say, “Yes. That’s who I am.” Without fear of rejection, hurt or loss, we willingly give ourselves.
Imagine and remember looking across the table into the eyes of a friend – new or old. Imagine the smile that twinkles in their eyes and spreads onto your face. Notice how time slows and relaxed as the words easily flow between the two of you and the world fades away. Imagine sharing your life story, not the historical facts, but the journey of becoming who you are. Feel being heard. Watch your listener. Honor your truth. As we stay with this way of knowing and being, we open to the understanding that we are one. We behold the truth of connection – that separation was the lie we were sold to keep us searching and reaching, and behaving in (what we now know were) destructive choices. We acknowledge this and move on, forward, toward each other.
Until we have connection – personal and physical, and emotional intimacy, how can we even imagine sexual satisfaction?  This is not to discount physical release, or immediate gratification, but to hold a higher standard for the spiritual union that sexuality offers. Rather than the momentary release of energy scatted without thought or cause, we are capable of higher glory and greater power. We hold within us creative energies which can shift perspectives, consciousness, and life itself. We deserve orgasms that bring us a renewed sense of hope and love or all mankind, that encourage peace in our hearts, and remind us of our Divine connection. For in that instance, we will have reached sexual satisfaction.

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